Category Archives: Satire

Writing Science Fiction

A guideline to how to woke-ify it, from Frank Fleming (who has a new book out), over at Sarah Hoyt’s place.

[Update a few minutes later]

Yes, this is a problem I’ve always had, too:

This one is going to be harder for some than others. Sarah Hoyt has been pretty good about this, while I have always struggled. But if at all possible, when you sit down to write, don’t be a straight white male. It’s not that there’s anything wrong with being a straight white male — you were born that way, no fault of your own — it’s just that everyone hates you. So stop it.

I don’t think I’m even going to work on that one.

[Update a couple minutes later]

Sarah has some blurbs about the book.

Dating Tips

My neighbor Kurt Schlichter has some for prominent Democrats:

Having needs is nothing to be ashamed of. You’ve taken on an awesome responsibility being a Democrat leader – you’re constantly struggling to hold up the burden imposed upon you by the support and acclaim of the D.C. establishment and the media. You have a right to extracurricular activities; why, liberal women will tell you themselves that the mere fact that you are quite willing to kill babies by the millions entitles you to all sorts of fringe benefits!

But hey, there are a lot of uptight people out there whose bourgeois notions of “right” and “wrong” really don’t account for the unique pressures and special requirements you face as a liberal icon lookin’ for some lovin’. So, you need to take precautions to ensure that people don’t get the right idea about what you are doing.

Wrong idea. I mean, wrong idea.

First, you’ll want to exclusively seek out liberal women. Don’t make Bill Clinton’s mistake and target women who aren’t reliable progressives. Pinko gals generally know how to play ball and won’t start some sort of fuss that will end up derailing your really important work towards the Democrat Party’s ultimate goal of turning America into Venezuela II: The Starvening.

I don’t think I need to say to read the whole thing.

[Update a few minutes later]

I made the mistake of reading the comments. The person over there describing a fetus as “a parasitic clump of cells” that are like “a cancer” is my nominee for Mother of the Year.

Kurt Schlichter

My neighbor of a few blocks away is whining about his victimhood:

I am also victimized for my unpaganhood, and I am constantly pressured to conform and accept weird weather religions and the theological musings of internet hipsters who think the idea of Christian grace is some sort of supernatural point system where you get into heaven for accomplishing a set number of good deeds. I reject these attempts to subjugate me to the dominant discourse, just as I reject the liberal Jesusplaining that seeks to steal my savior and turn him into some sort of socialist hippie, a Bernie Sanders in a robe who thinks the only sin is generating too big of a carbon footprint.

And then there is the systemic hate for my rigidly male monosexual identification and my pronounced pro-chick agenda. Too often those of you who are genderfluid deny the identity of those of us who are gendersolid.

Same.

Ron Wyden

Why he must resign:

The shocking revelation: Senator Wyden has been, for more than a decade, a willing accomplice to a plot to undermine the American political order and to overthrow the Constitution by infiltrating agents of radicalism into the highest reaches of the federal judiciary.

The nefariousness of this undertaking cannot be overstated. The monsters advanced to positions of power with Senator Wyden’s assistance include dangerous extremists whose ideology “represents a breathtaking retreat from the notion that Americans have fundamental Constitutional rights.” His agents take “a very dangerous view to our liberty” that “harkens back to the days when politicians restricted a people’s rights on a whim.”

Wyden’s anti-constitutional conspiracy “is couched in the sort of jurisprudence that justified the horrific oppression of one group after another in our first two centuries.”

This is cruel, but fair.

[Update a couple minutes later]

Former Obama official: “Why liberals should back Neil Gorsuch.”

[Update a while later]

Orrin Hatch on senate Democrats: “I don’t care what they want at this point.”

Neither do I.

[Update Thursday morning]

If you want to get non-hysterical takes on Gorsuch, the Volokh Conspiracy is your go-to place.