Giant calamari:

If cut up for calamari, the stories said, the squid would produce rings the size of tractor tires. As word got out that the catch had actually been recorded on video, Bennett found himself in the middle of an international bidding war.

Boy, you'd need a pretty big bowl for the dipping sauce.

Calamari Fritti Grosso

1 half-ton squid, cleaned and cut into bite size pieces
500 lbs flour
10.5 lbs paprika
10.5 pounds cayenne pepper
62.5 gallons of Marinara sauce
Enough vegetable oil to half fill one well cleaned cement truck.

While oil is heating to 325 degrees, (this might take a while) mix flour, paprika and cayenne pepper. Bread squid in flour mixture and fry squid in batches for 2 to 3 minutes per batch or until it reaches a light yellow color.

Serve with Marinara Sauce.

Makes approximately 2000 servings.

You for got the part about using a fork lift to remove the cooked portions...

Rand, how dare you write about fishermen, unless you're willing to risk your own life aboard a fishing vessel? Do you realize how many people lose their lives every year to put seafood on your table?

You chicken-of-the-sea-hawk!

(/channeling anonymoron)

Greg,
if you're cooking a ton of squid in a cement truck full of hot oil, probably a pitch fork would work best.