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Ouch
One of many (good) reasons that John Kerry will never be president. A letter to him from the troops:
DEAR SENATOR KERRY:
WE ARE STILL LAUGHING OVER HERE IN IRAQ AT YOUR JOKE ABOUT THE TROOPS BEING DUMB. WE DO RECOGNIZE THAT YOU ARE A LOT SMARTER THAN WE ARE BECAUSE YOU WERE ABLE TO GET OUT OF COMBAT IN THREE MONTHS. THIS IS WHY WE ARE SEEKING YOUR ADVICE. PLEASE GIVE US GUIDANCE.
1.) WHERE IS THE LEAST PAINFUL AREA ON THE BODY TO INFLICT A WOUND?
2.) DOES IT HAVE TO BLEED OR WILL A SCRATCH DO?
3.) WHERE DO YOU GET THE FORMS TO FILL OUT RECOMMENDING YOURSELF FOR A PURPLE HEART?
4.) DO YOU NEED A WITNESS? IF SO, HOW MUCH DOES THAT COST?
5.) ARE THREE PURPLE HEARTS STILL GOOD FOR A TRIP HOME?
6.) WHAT IS A REALISTIC PERIOD OF TIME IN WHICH TO ACQUIRE THESE WOUNDS? LESS THAN THREE MONTHS SOUNDS A LITTLE SUSPICIOUS EVEN TO US.
THANKS FOR YOUR HELP AND KEEP THE JOKES COMING.
JUST A DUMB G.I.
P.S.--WHAT ADVICE CAN YOU GIVE ME ON HOW TO MEET REALLY RICH WOMEN?
Posted by Rand Simberg at December 08, 2006 06:39 AM
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P.S.--WHAT ADVICE CAN YOU GIVE ME ON HOW TO MEET REALLY RICH WOMEN?
Just watch the news. When you hear that a private plane has crashed with a really rich guy on it but not his wife, move in.
Posted by John Kerry at December 8, 2006 06:44 AM
What really did it for me was when on our first date John wore his 3 purple hearts on his chest. I was putty in his arms after he told me, "I've got 3 purple hearts on my chest and one really big purple heart-on in my pants."
Posted by Teresa Heinz Kerry at December 9, 2006 08:43 PM
What's left off by the neo-con scumbags is
Kerry won a silver star
How many of the chickenhawks have one of those?
Posted by anonymous at December 10, 2006 12:03 AM
Yep, No snide remarks from the louses who infest this site.
You all forgot Kerry won a silver star for gallantry under fire.
Posted by anonymous at December 10, 2006 07:04 PM
No snide remarks from the louses who infest this site.
No, I'm pretty sure you were being snide.
Posted by John Irving at December 11, 2006 05:23 AM
Well there is a rather glorious level of
Irony watching Simberg the Chickenhawk
denigrate a War hero.
Posted by anonymous at December 11, 2006 08:00 PM
No, Anonymous Moron. The irony is a) watching you fantasize and have wet dreams that John Kerry is a war hero, and b) imagining that we care what an Anonymous Moron thinks.
Posted by Rand Simberg at December 11, 2006 08:05 PM
SImberg
Do you know what a Silver Star is?
"he Silver Star is the fifth highest military decoration that can be awarded to a member of the United States Armed Forces, and the third highest given for valor (in the face of the enemy)."
Real conservatives honor our war veterans,
neo-con's abuse them.
Posted by anonymous at December 12, 2006 07:48 AM
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