Clothes-Shopping Advice

…for women:

When it comes to shopping for fashion, women usually dominate, buying clothing for their men as well as themselves. But ladies, I have a gauntlet to throw down: Women have a lot to learn from the way men shop.

I first sensed this when menswear designer Thom Browne told me that he couldn’t use a fabric unless it felt good “to the hand,” because men won’t buy uncomfortable clothing.

Come again? If comfort were the top criterion for selling womenswear, Jimmy Choo would be out of business. Unlike men, women frequently settle for garments that don’t fit well and don’t feel good.

Women shop. Men buy clothes.

I’ve never understood why women let themselves be abused by the fashion industry. If they’d rebel against crap with labels, and letting Parisian poofters tell them what’s fashionable, the labels wouldn’t be able to get away with it.

31 thoughts on “Clothes-Shopping Advice”

  1. No man this side of “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” will knowingly buy uncomfortable clothes and especially not uncomfortable shoes (and I suspect the Queer Eye guys wouldn’t, either). That so many women will buy uncomfortable clothing is one of many things I’ll never understand about them.

  2. Rand,

    You under estimate the power of Peer Pressure and Reference Groups in shaping consumer’s opinion, just as it shapes folk’s political opinions.

    Opinion leaders make up about 12% of the population on a subject like fashion, the other 88% tend to look to others for guidance.

  3. Rand wrote:

    “I’ve never understood why women let themselves be abused by the fashion industry.”

    A major part of the reason is the fact that women do not dress for men..they dress in competition with each other (usual gaussian distribution caveat assumed). This provides a field of warfare in which to compete.

    A fairly benign field of warfare, although there has been reported bloodshed when the doors opened at Filene’s Basement (when they were in existence).

    And I know one fashionista who does actually buy shoes that do not fit and are not comfortable if the price for the name brand pair saves her money. She admits it.

  4. Gregg is correct. Also, women’s clothes are much more disposable (heh). A woman may wear a particular outfit a few times; quality is less of an issue. Apart from a change of station in life, men buy new clothes only when their existing attire wears out.

  5. Apart from a change of station in life, men buy new clothes only when their existing attire wears out.

    Or no longer fits.

  6. Not every pair of Jimmy Choos or Louboutins are uncomfortable. Some women prefer and are more comfortable in heels than flats. Then again, maybe a blind test of comfort would help in eliminating the “it’s designer, so it must feel good” delusions that some women have. My ex had a particular pair of non-designer heels that she wore on a very regular basis for work, and would often have up to 2 pairs in reserve for when they wore out. I can’t really mock her for it, given that I’ve gone through three pairs of sneakers over the last couple of years, and each one is the exact same model/style as the previous.

    One need only go into a department store to understand the difference between women and men’s clothing; the Clearance section in Women’s clothing is larger than the entirety of the Men’s department in most stores.

    I lament the demise of one of the malls here in town. While the department anchor in that store still has another location in the other mall, the location that closed had a MUCH bigger and more well-staffed men’s department than the one that remained.

  7. Apart from a change of station in life, men buy new clothes only when their existing attire wears out.

    Or no longer fits.

    Heh.

    I could outfit a small platoon of men with my collection of jeans, as long as each soldier was a slightly larger size than each other. Some day, I’ll fit into the old jeans, which is why I keep them around, or so I tell myself.

  8. I’ve never understood why women let themselves be abused by the fashion industry.

    A man who says that better not have a garage full of power tools that he uses, on average, twice per decade apiece.

  9. Some women prefer and are more comfortable in heels than flats.

    This is a delusion. They may have developed a habit which makes it seem more comfortable, but heels are not natural. They not only make a woman taller, they also put more swish in the hips. Comfort has absolutely nothing to do with heels.

    …and it has almost nothing to do with men. It’s the female lion that does the hunting.

  10. “Apart from a change of station in life, men buy new clothes only when their existing attire wears out.

    …..Or no longer fits.”

    Or, has a grossly obvious stain that they cannot figure out how to remove, hide, or no longer ignore.

  11. I must be in the minority. I would rather be comfortable than fashionable any day. I won’t wear heels because they kill my feet and back; I buy slacks with pockets so I don’t have to carry a purse; and why the heck would I want to wear “fashions” designed by people who obviously hate women?

  12. Word, lbparker.

    I once bought a pair of Gloria Vanderbilt jeans at a discount store (I needed jeans and they were really cheap).

    The first thing I did when I got to where I was going, before I put the jeans on, was to carefully cut her label off the outside of the back pocket. When a friend asked why, I told her that Gloria wasn’t paying me to advertise her clothing line on my ass (or anywhere else).

    I’ve never been impressed by that crap.

    I wear flats exclusively, too, and never buy pants or jackets without pockets (I prefer blouses with pockets, too, but they’re well-neigh impossible to find now).

  13. A third woman here chiming in to say: I refuse to wear uncomfortable clothes: the cloth has to be soft and breathable, and I must be protected from chafing. Shoes are floors for my feet, not weapons in the perpetual Sexy Female Standoff. I do have a couple of pairs of shoes with small heels; I have the feeling they are going to the Goodwill soon, since I never wear them.

    I’ve always been this way. My preference for jeans and button-down shirts instead of frilly dresses with itchy lace and what-have-you was a constant source of frustration for my mother and grandmother. They were otherwise sensible women, but couldn’t understand a female who didn’t want to dress up.

  14. Guess I’m the odd girl out here. I routinely wear heels, and tell my staff that the extra couple of inches of a nice set of wedges helps during surgery as it gives me a better view of the field. Obviously this is nonsense (I’m on the tall side for a woman already) but it amuses me.

    Nearly all of my footwear, even the Manolos and the one pair of Louboutins, are quite comfortable. I will happily traipse the length of Rodeo drive wearing them (though admittedly those sorts of shoes are more for evening wear). But I wear athletic shoes as well, so perhaps my particular feet aren’t all that picky.

    I very much like stylish and fashionable clothing and keep up with trends, etc. I do tend towards the reasonably practical, but many places my husband and I frequent have dress codes, so we’re expected to dress up a little bit.

    I think it all dates back to the veldt of Africa. We were hunter-gatherers then, but generally the men were hunting and the women gathering. Perhaps that’s what is reflected in our shopping behavior even today.

  15. Incidentally, I wonder if these men with their helpful advice on how women should clothes shop and dress like men are the same ones who turn around and complain that women aren’t feminine anymore.

  16. Did you just get married, Jane? Your last name seems to have changed. If so, congratulations and mazel tov, usw.

  17. Well, it was in October of 2009, but I haven’t been around here much lately so perhaps you didn’t notice. But thanks all the same.

    I’ll try to hang out hereabouts more – I think it helps keep me sharp in some respects and I always learn something.

  18. I always learn something.

    An elegantly ambiguous statement. An excellent illustration for another thread, where I argued the flexibility of English is one of its most powerful features.

    In my house, when my younger children argue fiercely, I teach that the correct way (at least at the dinner table) to say “you are a God-damned moron and everything you say is vile nonsense” is “Thank you for your opinion.”

    I have had the pleasure of seeing one seething red-faced with fury preteen hiss at his brother: Thank you for your opinion! only to have the brother rejoin hotly Oh no! Thank YOU for YOUR opinion!

  19. @Carl … At least my power tools are still usable after 10 years! And I don’t buy the same type of power tool over and over again …

  20. Huh, now that Jane mentions it, I see that Prada does have a line of Christian Dior Operating Theatre 5-inch heels. Always learn something, indeed…

  21. Well, I suspect that men have the same relationship with tools and computer software/goodies as women have with shoes and handbags.

    An amusing story: A few years ago there was a (rare) empty slot in Trafford Centre, Manchester (for non-brits this place would probably be a medium size mall in the States) which was next door to a high-class boutique. It was filled by a man who was told by everyone around that he was mad; he put a computer store in it, and told them all just to watch.

    Went ballistic from Day One. Gap spotted in the market; you know all those guys hanging around outside the boutique tapping feet and looking at watches while girlfriend or wife was shopping? Right. Oddly enough, the boutique’s sales went up too – probably for the same reason

  22. @Fletcher:

    Before smoking fell back out of vogue, and during the cigar boom, the cigar store that my roommate worked at (and I hung out in) in the mall was three doors down from an anchor. We had a lounge in the back with couches and chairs, and it was a hopping, happening place during the winter shopping season, as men would peel themselves away to find respite from the grind of checking out EVERY storefront.

    Probably didn’t hurt that most of the makeup counter girls and hair stylists in the mall took their cigarette breaks in there in the winter, too. 🙂

  23. I wear OD 5.11 Trousers with ample cargo pockets. But then again I am issued them so that makes the choice easy and economical.

    The sole woman in our group complains about how the womens cut is on the order sheet but the purchasing guy never wants to order them and stick her in a small mans size instead.

    I think she is going to kill him eventually.

  24. They have some heel height on the kind of “figure skates” that serious freestyle/ice dance skaters use — even for the guys — although hockey skates may be flats. Someone explained to me that without some “lift” in the boots, it is nigh impossible to do a 3-turn, which is the basic maneuver for changing between the forward and backward direction without changing the foot you are skating on, common to figure, freestyle, and ice dance skating.

    So a lot of guys have had heel shoes on without giving the matter much thought, although guys doing anything on skates apart from hockey and maybe speed skating have always been suspect (not that there is anything wrong with that!) owing to cultural prejudice about proper sports for guys.

    I see some women tottering on spike heels and think of fashion or overt sexism (for women to think they have to wear those things to be feminine). On the other hand, given that the heel on the boot makes the skates more maneuverable, I would not reject out-of-hand the claim by some women that they feel more comfortable in some of their heel shoes.

    As to the damage done by heels, I know some sensible-shoe women who don’t have the collection of bunions and toe dislocations that many women have. (Didn’t Eddie Murphy play a love-them-and-leave them cad with a fetish for perfect feet in the move “Boomerang?”)

    Can’t say the same thing for myself — I have a mild big toe dislocation that a podiatrist diagnosed as an arthritis of the joint but which I blame on custom Harlicks and hours spent in skating practice.

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