Outta Here

See you later.

[Saturday morning update]

That was my first experience flying Spirit airlines. Also likely my last, other than my planned return on Tuesday. Got to the airport, had a hell of a time finding parking, and it took a lot longer to get to the terminal than planned. We had a very crowded line both for check-in and security, got to the gate just in time to board. It turned out that it didn’t matter since, when we got there, the board said “Delayed.” No estimated time of departure, no explanation. There was a plane sitting a few hundred feet off the gate in an obvious state of being repaired. About an hour or so later, they announced a new gate. We go over to the new gate, which is on the opposite side of the concourse.

This is an international concourse (Concourse H in Terminal 4 at Fort Lauderdale), and it was designed by a madman. On the west side runs a glassed-in hallway, through which deplaning passengers pass on their way to immigration and customs. In order to board the aircraft, one must cross this hallway. Obviously, since one cannot mix domestic passenger still in the US, and newly-arrived passengers somewhere in international limbo, no one can board until the hallway is clear. But there is apparently little reservoir for people at I&C, so they back up into the hallway. All the way to the end of the concourse. And then all the way back to the beginning of the hallway, doubling around. We are told that we can’t board until these hundreds of passengers have cleared the hallway.

Now, each gate has dual doors in the hallway, so that the hallway can be cut off to let passengers board. But this would, of course, cut off the people in the hallway trying to advance up the line. The obvious solution is traffic control, in which the hallway is temporarily closed, board some passengers, reopen the hallway to clear the backup, board some more passengers, etc. but it takes them a maddeningly long time to actually do this.

But finally, we get on the plane. We taxi out, at which point the pilot announces that they just have to do one final balance check, and then they can take off. I have never heard of a balance check on an aircraft the size of a Boeing 737 before. They must be running very tight margins on packing passengers and cargo into this aircraft if they have to worry about this. But apparently, things turned out to be all right, as I didn’t notice them shifting passengers around. And only two and three quarters hours after the original scheduled departure, we are in the air.

I wasn’t aware of this but everything on Spirit, other than the seat and bottled water, is a la carte, and overpriced (two bucks for a box of pretzels, a dollar for a soft drink, no protein of any kind on offer). But at least they take (in fact insist on) credit cards. Also, checking luggage is ten bucks per bag (unless you purchase in advance on line, in which case it’s only five). I actually like this, as I’ve long advocated the end of subsidizing checked luggage by those traveling light. The seats don’t recline, though they tantalize you with a button, anyway.

The flight was also quite noisy, with numerous crying babies and loud (semi)adults. I’ve never understood why some people feel the need to spout their inanities to each other at a volume that can be heard halfway down the length of the aircraft. I don’t know whether they imagine that the rest of us will be fascinated by their lives, and are rapt at every word, or that simply have no sense whatsoever of self consciousness.

In any event, we finally got into Detroit about three hours later than planned (about ten thirty, once I got the rental). We had originally expected to be in around seven thirty, with time for dinner, and then a three-hour drive up to the lake. Instead, we grabbed some deli sandwiches at a twenty-four hour supermarket in Fenton, and drove straight up from there, arriving around two AM.

Hopefully, the rest of the weekend will go more smoothly. But I’m not looking forward to a 6:45 AM return on Tuesday morning via Spirit.