Category Archives: Humor

Humor, Media Criticism, Political Commentary, Weird

A Misdiagnosis

46 Comments

No, Mr. President, you’ve been making a lot of mistakes as president, but there has been no shortage of stories you’ve been telling the public.

Let’s see, shall we count them?

  • My administration will be the most transparent in history.
  • If you like your doctor and your insurance, you can keep them.
  • I’ll go through the budget line by line and find places to cut.
  • It’s not a tax. Except when it is.
  • I will cut the deficit in half.
  • If we pass this stimulus, unemployment will never go above eight percent.

I could go on and on.

Humor, Popular Culture, Science And Society

Hope This Doesn’t Happen In Tonight’s Game

23 Comments

What happens when a ball is pitched at 0.9c?

Verlander’s good, but I don’t think he’s got that kind of arm.

[Update at the bottom of the first inning]

Wow. Between Verlander and (non)Fielder, the Tigers just screwed the American League team. They’re down 5-0 in the first, and the National League hasn’t even batted.

I’m guessing that Verlander’s problem was that he’s not used to pitching just two innings, and was off his early game.

Business, Economics, Humor, Political Commentary, Satire

Political Particle Physics

2 Comments

Iowahawk reports on a new pseudoscientific breakthough:

The landmark experiment in Quantum Rhetoric began early this week after legal particle cosmologist John Roberts published a paper in the Quarterly Journal of Tortured Logic that solved the long-debated Pelosi’s Paradox in Universal Health Care Theory.

“Pelosi’s Paradox states that in order to find out what is in a health care bill, it would have to be passed,” explained physicist Steven Hawking. “But in order to be a law it would have to be constitutional, which means someone would have to know what was in it, which would mean it couldn’t have been a bill in the first place. Think of Schroedinger’s Cat, except with a lobotomy.”

Actually, I don’t think that Nancy Pelosi has the requisite equipment for a lobotomy.

Humor, Media Criticism, Political Commentary

The Mystery Of The Decision

16 Comments

Solved: “Randy Barnett made a wish on a cursed monkey’s paw that his commerce clause argument would be accepted. It explains everything, no?”

Seriously, here’s what I think happened. Roberts initially voted with the others to throw out the whole law, and has spent the last several weeks trying to pick up at least one more vote (perhaps from Breyer or Sotomayor — Ginsburg and Kagan were never a possibility) to make it 6-3 instead of a narrow 5-4. At the end, he gave up, and decided to narrowly keep it instead of narrowly strike it down. I think that explains the facts, and the bizarre opinion, which was nowhere near as cogent and well thought out as what became the dissent. And I’ll bet that the new minority is pretty angry at him right now (and have been since he switched).