Jonah Goldberg has some thoughts on vegan diets and their attempts at meat simulation:
…if one is to take the arguments of the ethical vegans at face value, isn’t it a bit disgusting or immoral to make products that look like the foods they consider most evil? Fake hamburgers are really a marvel, but while they still come up short on the taste front, they certainly look like hamburgers. If meat is murder, why hawk products that look like the mutilated corpse? Consider our views on cannibalism, then imagine selling faux human flesh in, say, the form of human thumbs — “It tastes just like a missionary!” Wouldn’t that still be in poor taste?
Technology advances are going to make this even more complicated in the future. I suspect that at some point cloning technology will enable us to grow meat in a vat, and probably pretty good-tasting meat at that. What does this do to the vegan argument against animal cruelty? Or to extend Jonah’s example, if we could grow long pork without harming any sentient humans in the process, would it be wrong to eat it? Should it be illegal? For that matter, would it really be human flesh? If so, what would make it that — just the DNA content of the cells?
This seems similar to child pr0n, in that one has to separate the act of consumption from the act of production. It’s pretty clearly wrong to produce child pr0n using actual children, but if it’s computer animated, who does it hurt? Yes, I understand the argument that we should discourage the consumption as well, lest it lead to a demand for supply, though I don’t think that the Supreme Court agrees. But how many vegans would eat animal flesh if it weren’t produced from whole animals with brains and nervous systems? Judging by the repeated attempts to replicate the carnivorous experience from vegetation, quite a number, I’d imagine.
Once upon a long time ago, there was a short story in (I think) Analog Science Fiction where a group of scientists created a genetically engineered pig that chewed its cud. (Leave aside the absurdity of the concept for a moment.)
One of the questions at the news conference was: “Is it kosher?”
So the scientists went to find a rabbi. Who concluded that it was, then had to more-or-less eat his words (or according to his words, at least.)
I’m still looking forward to wearing genetically engineered photosynthetic skin, so I can get my food from the sun and air, and then I can go protest against vegans for butchering my floral bretheren…
Arthur C. Clarke was way ahead of the curve, as usual. He anticipated this issue in 1964.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Food_of_the_Gods_(short_story)
My problem with veganism (besides that absolutely awful health consequences to the individual) is that it doesn’t consider the habitat and ecological harm done by modern farming. Do you have any idea how few natural prairies remain in America today? Simply culling a few buffalo from the herd is far less destructive to animal life than wiping out the whole habitat and planting soy.
“imagine selling faux human flesh in, say, the form of human thumbs — “It tastes just like a missionary!” Wouldn’t that still be in poor taste?”
The real question here seems to be (to me, anyway): would they be considered a finger food?
Screw this, I want people kibble (no, not that kind…): inexpensive nutritionally complete food for people; no prep or thought required. Really, it’s 2011 folks, can we get that already? Not asking for a flying car. I mean, if we can get convenient food-in-a-bag, how ‘bout they make something healthy instead of junk food?
Brock,
All meat we eat first eats something else. The amount of total farmland necessary to generate a pound of protein from a cow is much much higher than say soy.
If we all ate wild caught game you might have a point… but there is not enough wild game by 5 or 6 orders of magnitude.
My problem with people who call themselves Vegans is, not once have I met one who was actually from Vega.
Titus See:
http://www.angryman.ca/monkey.html
He lasted 7 days on primate kibble.
Paul, it looks dodgy, but it now has my attention…
I think we should eat vegans. The best way to cook a vegan is to pack one in a thick layer of salt and bake them at medium heat for a few hours. They come out very juicy and tasty. It’s a firehouse recipe I learned from my firefighter nephew.
My problem with people who call themselves Vegans is, not once have I met one who was actually from Vega.
I too felt a letdown when I realized they were frauds in this regard. I was so hoping to be able to find a way back to my home planet, where I could feat on roast/baked Vegan.
I also found the judges of the 9th Circuit Court to be actual humans of a sort, despite their otherworldly court rulings. Again, I had hope to hitch a ride home with them when they went back to report to their insectoid overlords.
I’ll believe a vegetarian is serious if they file off their canine teeth or otherwise have them removed, thus permanently renouncing meat. So far, all I have met is poseurs who keep their canines while bitching at the rest of us. Sorta like all those who say we have to reduce our fossil fuel consumption, as they jet around all over the world to their conferences rather than using Skype.
I think we should eat vegans. The best way to cook a vegan is to pack one in a thick layer of salt and bake them at medium heat for a few hours. They come out very juicy and tasty. It’s a firehouse recipe I learned from my firefighter nephew.
They’re even better when you wrap them with bacon before cooking.
http://www.quarrygirl.com/2011/04/13/rant-veg-news-is-putting-the-meat-into-vegan-issues/
Vegan website photoshops pictures of meat and claims they are vegan…
Not bad for Friday.
Brock,
All meat we eat first eats something else. The amount of total farmland necessary to generate a pound of protein from a cow is much much higher than say soy.
If we all ate wild caught game you might have a point… but there is not enough wild game by 5 or 6 orders of magnitude.
Paul, most cattle production is done on grasslands unsutiable for rowcrop production. There are areas where I live used for dairy and meat farming that are too rugged for rowcrops. Yes, we do grow grain for feed but cattle forage for most of their calories.
Once upon a long time ago, there was a short story in (I think) Analog Science Fiction where a group of scientists created a genetically engineered pig that chewed its cud
http://turtledove.wikia.com/wiki/The_R-Strain
I remember a Nebula or Hugo award winner set in the future where a synthetic food producer was charged for making their meat like products popular by using – gasp! – real meat. Oh the horror!
Guess the “Biting Commentary…” is apropos for this topic.
M Puckett Says: “cattle forage for most of their calories.”
I agree. That’s how we do it. Why doesn’t everyone have 5 acres of rough pasture to raise their meat? And chickens take hardly any space at all!
It doesn’t make sense.
It’s worth keeping in mind that hamburgers don’t look like mutilated cow parts. They look like patties of homogenized protein. And there’s a significant amount of infrastructure supporting this protein patty technology. So why not make a vegetarian protein patty that replicates the functionality of the hamburger and can be put on buns with all the fixings (vegetarian, of course)? Wouldn’t that make sense?
Karl, it’s been done. I used to sell them. They don’t replicate real burgers very well, though.
Vegetarian sausages, however, are fairly successful. I imagine that the reason for that is that many meat sausages have very little real meat in them – for example, pork sausages contain pig, including bits of the pig that hardly anyone ever eats. And many sausages are at least 50% rusk.