19 thoughts on “Those Endless Recipe Pages”

    1. But what about mayo? It’s not in the name! And what about a recipe for an LGBT, which has guacamole?

      Anyway, I’m gonna share my recipe for a glass of ice-water, which my great-grandfather developed in Montana back in 1883. You see, back then…

      *scrolls past eighteen pages of a Louis L’Amour style Western*

      … so by gently pouring the water over the carefully chiseled ice shards, instead of just plonking them in, you won’t splash water on your counter top, and you won’t alert the Blackfeet to your presence.

  1. Well I for one appreciate the recipe for slicing a tomato. Here I had been using a butter knife all along!

  2. Seems like it would be simple to a) give a straightforward recipe, and 2) provide “unique content” without have War and Peace length purple prose inserted anywhere. To wit:

    Meringue recipe:
    * 4 eggs
    * 1/4 teaspoon cream of tartar
    * 1/4 cup sugar

    1) Separate eggs, save the yolks for later
    2) Whip until stiff (heh heh heh…)
    3) Fold in the cream of tartar and sugar
    4) Spread on target desert, and bake for about 10 minutes at 350 F

    Which brings to mind an ancient lament in the tongue of the Auld Elves:

    “A Unicef clearasil
    Gibberish ‘n’ drivel
    O Mennen mylar muriel
    With a hey derry tum gardol
    O Yuban necco glamorene?
    Enden nytol, vaseline!
    Sing hey nonny nembutal.”

    There you go. Short, to the point, but with unique (albeit plagiarized) content.

  3. “Search Engine Optimization”

    The know their market and are creating web pages with that market in mind. And that market is not people who are looking for recipes.

  4. We have 12 or more cookbooks in our house, from the simple Better Homes & Gardens plaid cookbook, the Betty Crocker Giant Cookbook, a few family recipe collections, a specialty book or two…

    I think I see the iPad on the cookbook stand on the counter more often than any of them. And all of the auto-play videos on those pages are almost more annoying than the endless back-stories.

  5. A 2,000-word story about how eggs Benedict reminds you of idyllic summer vacations is just the digital equivalent of fencing in the commons.

    Oh, PLEASE.

    It doesn’t remove anyone else’s access to anything.

    It might vaguely help your search rankings.

    (Right now the top hit for me for “BLT recipe”, using Google search, goes to AllRecipes.

    Which has ingredients and the ENTIRE set of directions (2 steps!) on the visible page when loaded on my 1440p monitor.

    I’m not feeling like The Lords have stolen My Recipe Access with their evil “flavor text”.

    Considering how much of that makes it into print cookbooks, I suspect some people really like “personal stories about food”.)

    1. That reminds me of a totally awesomesauce recipe for oatmeal that goes back to the Highland Clearances. While we pour a quart of water, let us consider land tenure from the perspectives of Karl Polanyi and Michel Foucault…

  6. This is why, when I want a recipe, I go to YouTube. Often their cooking videos have too much blather, but that doesn’t try my patience as much.

      1. His upspeak is a little annoying but that’s alright because after all, you are the captain of the kitchen, the commadore of the cheese drawer, and you can do whatever you want.

        He did a dip inspired by sloppy joes a few weeks ago that I’m going to make for superbowl.

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