A Crisis Of Confidence

American’s government is losing faith in its out-of-touch constituents. A heart-rending editorial by Arlen Sphinecter and Secretary Sebelius:

Like hundreds of our fellow legislators and government officials, we recently traveled to a town hall meeting to distribute a grassroots press release explaining why this critical legislation is a done deal. Our advance staffs said that should anticipate a respectful, positive hearing from local media and bused-in union members. Instead we were greeted by a rude howling mob of idiot “voters” who refused to listen to reason, and ruined what should have been a killer photo op for our re-election ad campaign.

Have these arrogant ivory tower armchair quarterbacks ever had to live with the pressures of being a working stiff Senator or Cabinet Secretary in Washington DC? Have they ever had to juggle markup language on a supplemental appropriations bill, or deal with an incompetent Chief of Staff who constantly double-books fund raising dinners? Apparently not, if their whiny obnoxious chants are any indication. “Read the Bill! Read the Bill!” blah, blah, blah, as if we weren’t already exhausted from writing and voting for the damned thing.

The nerve of these people.

[Update a few minutes later]

More from the Hawk of Iowa: “Know Your Town-Hall Mob Agitators“:

Pay them no heed, for these outside agitators in no way represent any threat to our great patriotic push forward for increased citizen heathfulness! These well-dressed prep school gangsters of reaction seek only to frighten and demoralize and intimidate you, with their confusing “facts” and hob-nailed Sperry Topsiders. Unfortunately they are joined in conspiracy by a well-financed network of unlicensed blogs and talk radio traitors, who exaggerate their numbers and percolate disinformation — even cleverly staged YouTube videos of an impostor President Obama saying “quotes”!

Remain strong, citizen, for the day of their comeuppance is near! Patriotic spontaneous volunteers from MoveOn.org, Organizing For America, HCAN, SEIU, AFSCME, ACORN, NPR, and MSNBC have all pledged independent grassroots efforts to spread the word about the health-hating tricksters and their transparent astroturf agitation campaign!

You too can help by remaining ever-vigilant for health traitors in your local sectors. But beware: though small in number the state health reform enemy is clever, and well trained in subterfuge and disguise by his monopolist paymasters. Your job is to recognize his signs, and report any fishy-seeming protest or blog activities to me or other official authorities within the Health Care Truth Ministry. Here is a visual training course to help you in the execution of this important patriotic duty.

Read all, and be alert. As we all know, the world can always use more lerts.

10 thoughts on “A Crisis Of Confidence”

  1. Sheesh, all we hear is health care this and health care that. Don’t you people have more important things to think about? It’s almost as if you people don’t have actual lives. Just pay your taxes, shut up and leave us the heck alone.

  2. Politician: …and furthermore, health care reform is for your own good.

    Crowd: Go to hell!

    Politician: I won’t stand to be talked to that way.

    Crowd: Don’t you like end of life counseling?

  3. I’m from PA, and as I read Iowahawk’s (latest) brilliant work, I could hear it in Specter’s voice and cadence.

    The sad thing is, it’s probably what he really thinks.

  4. Someone should show up to a town hall meeting wearing a fedora and pinstriped suit and carrying a violin case – with a bookmarked copy of the ObamaCare bill inside.

    Okay, make that a cello case. Or several violin cases carried by several pinstriped mobsters.

  5. The 1st Admendment gives you the right to peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances. Like many things in the constitution, the word “peaceably” is not defined. From what I’ve seen of these town hall meetings, some of them are bumping up against that definition.

    A lot of the tactics I’ve seen at these town halls are classic temper tantrums – shouting down speakers, loud chants, and screaming fits.

    Temper tantrums are the favored tactic of 5-year-olds everywhere, primarily because they don’t require any intellectual argument. They aren’t very appealing to watch, nor are they very convincing.

  6. A lot of the tactics I’ve seen at these town halls are classic temper tantrums – shouting down speakers, loud chants, and screaming fits.

    Yeah, that never happened when the Republicans were trying to fix Social Security. Or do anything that the left didn’t like.

  7. What the Gerbil is saying is “How dare the riffraff speak as individuals? Don’t they know only the elite may speak for them!”

    He disguises this with moronic diversions and elementary school insults, when his true desire is for people to shut up and obey his masters.

  8. Rand – “He did it first” is also 5-year-old logic. More to the point, I don’t recall people shouting down Congressmen or disrupting meetings during the effort to privatize social security.

    John Irving – Ah, namecalling. How adult! No, my true desire is for people to be polite.

  9. You are a gerbil, Chris. Youre a little rodent who wants a master to keep him in a cage and take care of him, and you’re worth about as much.

    You ask for politeness after describing people excercising their rights to free speech as throwing temper tantrums. Your ilk helped establish exactly how protests are to be done, and your masters have done far more to shut them down. Never mind politeness, I’ll give you honesty, something far more valuable and rarely shown by you.

    Go to hell, and take your masters with you.

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